Aphid Todayphid
All the news that fit to print, but really, really small
Dear Wringwraiths,
This very occasional newsletter is for those of you interested in the work of Yours Truly, the writer-comedian Robert Wringham.
After a dismal few months, I’m back in the plush old saddle. As such, I have some announcements for you.
I hope that’s okay. To keep things from being entirely mercenary, I’ve springled some short entries from my blog, The Occasional Papers along the way.
New Escapologist Kickstarter
Once every two years, we run a Kickstarter to raise capital for New Escapologist, the magazine for white-collar workers with escape on the brain. If you’re able, please back this campaign to ensure four more issues.
The basic target has been met, which means it’s happening (!) but it’s the minimum of what we need and only really pays for printing. In 2023, we managed to raise over £8,000 which is a far healthier operating fund. At present, I can’t pay any writers or channel any funds into my own ability to continue living. So please feed the meter at the same time as guaranteeing yourself some magazine fun over the next two years. Think of the satisfying plop it will make when the postman shoves it through the letterbox. “It’s here!” you will exclaim, "New Escapologist! New Escapologist!”
A neighbour is setting up some deckchairs and a picnic table on the back court.
This is what I call “the Glasgow rain dance.”
See also: “summoning a postman” (drawing a bath).
Idler Festival
11th-13th July.
I’m doing 45 minutes about “how to escape the daily grind” on the Sunday. This should be a good hangout opportunity if you’re able to come along.
Samara is drawing a “penanggalan” for her Monster of the Week blog. It’s a flying human head with guts hanging out of the neck hole.
“I can’t get the nose right,” she says.
Iceman Film
We filmed some connective tissue and melted a block (pictured above) in Wolverhampton last week and we’ve scheduled one last shoot in Bournemouth in late July. The final edit is due in September. That’s unfortunately not when you’ll be able to watch the film because we still need to secure a distribution deal, but hopefully this will all strike you as progress. You can buy merch to support this no-budget film’s production here.
Book pitch! A time-travel spy caper.
The Man Who Was Next Thursday.
Oh come on, that’s really good.
Mysterious Novel
I’m being deliberately coy about the title and synopsis of my next novel, due in September.
It’s a comedy, is quite short but not insubstantial, and is currently listed as “untitled yellow hardback.”
This limited first edition is a bit pricey, so hang on ‘til early next year for a cheaper, less mysterious paperback if you like. But if you enjoy mystery and being part of the fun, here’s where to pre-order the hardback.
A sign for an auction house promises “thousands of antiques” but it looks about thirty years old.
It’s either hubris (“our suppliers will never, ever let us down”) or defeatism (“no one will ever buy this shit.”)
Diary at the Centre of the Earth: Vol. 1. 1997-2007.
I have edited the first volume of Dickon Edwards’ diaries for print. There will soon be a Kickstarter to take pre-orders but it’s not online yet, so hold tight.
As members of my mailing list though, I think you deserve a sneak peak of the cover art (above) I commissioned from Lawrence Gullo. The artwork and book design is meant to evoke The Yellow Book, a 19th-centuty literary magazine edited by Aubrey Beardsley. This long-awaited volume (long-awaited by me, which is why I had to make it happen myself) also has an editorial note from Yours Truly, an introduction by Travis Elborough, and some really great supplementary material in the back.
It should be worth the wait, a very special book indeed.
In an antihistamine-induced stupor, demi- and semi- idea fragments drift across the surface of my mind like floaters across an eye.
One such fragment, today, are the words “Aphid Todayphid,” which sounds like a topical news magazine for aphids.
Aphid Todayphid: all the news that fit to print, but really, really small.
I like the idea of being in a scrum of journalists at a press conference:
“Yes, Robert Wringham for Aphid Todayphid. Mister Prime Mininster, what is Number 11’s line regarding the impact of this latest u-turn on the cost of living crisis?”
“Thank you for your question, Robert. Um, sorry, Aphid Today?”
“Phid.”
At least we have an earthly use for font size 1 now.
That’s all for now. If you only snaffle up one thing from this email, let it be the next four (or one or two) issues of New Escapologist via the Kickstarter. Thank you.
Until next time…
Robert Wringham x
www.wringham.co.uk
Ohh goodness! I loved the little bit at the end about the “aphid todayphid” newsmagazine. yes, yes, that was surreal yet brilliant.
all the news of the world in print-but in really, really tiny print.